It’s Thanksgiving Eve, there’s a crap ton to do.

Did you take the turkey out of the freezer? Oh hell no, I asked you!

Better get that bird in the tub, he’ll be frozen till June.

No one likes an arctic bird, I know we will call him Elsa, I bet he can sing quite a tune.

We have green-beans and cranberries, I see giblets galore.

Quick…5 second rule, I just dropped the stuffing on the floor.

The rolls are real sticky, the potatoes turned brown.

It’s OK, don’t sweat it, the family will be drunk as we pass them around.

The turkey is ready to be stuffed to the gills.

WTF is that his neck? Please pass me one of those pills.

This meal only happens just one day a year.

Why do we stress and pour alcohol to calm all the fear.

Its about being thankful so relax and decompress.

Pour the vodka, beer or Zin, perhaps a Xanax is best.

Sit with your family and relish this thought.

29 days till Christmas and I already can’t remember what I bought.

Happy Harvest to you and yours.

May your day be filled with cheer.

What’s that smell, oh shit the turkey? Can we do it at your house next year?