It seems like everywhere I turn, someone is either writing or talking about how mothers, fathers, and guardians of any kind should love and savour each and every moment with their children. I mean, of course we should, right? Our little people grow so fast and it feels like each time we snap our fingers, another birthday is rolling around the corner.
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These children of yours will soon start needing you less and less while they learn to do things on their own. Need to get dressed? Sorry mom, I’m 12 and I’m good. Need a bed time story? Sorry dad, I’m 17 and I’m way over it.
But while loving the moments we have with our children is special, not everyone agrees that each and every moment is to be classified as “special”.
Kids cry, and they whine and complain and are ungrateful at times. How is anyone supposed to love a moment that makes you wish a meteor would drop down on your house right then and there?
I love being with my child, don’t get me wrong, but I do not love each and every moment with him.
Here are some of the times thought that I feel that we, as guardians of the new generation, should appreciate each and every moment of.
Your kid will get shit for you when you ask them to.
I don’t know about you, but my kid likes helping out. He feels superior, like he is the only one who can get the job right. By asking him to get me that book on the table on my side of the bed in my room, I’ve given him some serious direction and the sureness to follow through.
My little guy will find whatever I’ve asked for and hand it to me with pride like he’s delivered an important ancient artifact. Soak in these times because they sure don’t last forever.
Kids will be your mediator so you don’t need to get up and/or interact with people.
Children like feeling in charge. Allowing my kid to take control of certain duties lifts his confidence. Sometimes, when I need to ask my husband something and I don’t want to move, I’ll send my mini to do my bidding.
After I explain that “mommy can’t hear daddy, please go ask him…” he’ll run off down the hall, yelling to his dad something not even remotely close to what I said. The gibberish my son spews to his dad piques dad’s interest and my husband will come and ask me what it was I wanted. I’m going to miss these days when they’re gone.
Kids are great for using as excuses.
Don’t feel like going out? “I’m sorry, my kid is sick, I can’t come”.
Don’t want to go to work? “I’m sorry, my kid is sick, I can’t come in today”.
Don’t want to meet people after work for dinner? “I’m sorry, I can’t. I have no one to watch my kid”.
Don’t want to vacuum the house? “The kid is sleeping, I better not”.
Kids are great for your physical well-being and keeping active.
How can they not be? You’re constantly running around, trying to find the kid who snuck away or catch the kid before he makes it to the stairs with the gate that’s been accidentally left open.
The mess they create will keep you occupied on the weekends when you’re stuck indoors rage-cleaning your house after a long week of build-up. And don’t forget the lifting. Who needs weights when you have children? Throw in some squats while holding them and you’re on your way to having buns of steel.
Kids will always need you, no matter how old they are.
In every moment of your child’s life, they need you. Whether it’s to open a granola bar or help with homework or pay for their wedding or babysit their kids. While the neediness lessens as they grow older and you are no longer needed to wipe their bum or lay with them at night, they will still need you.
The moments will be farther in between, but when they do come, you’ll hold on to them knowing that they never stopped needing you, it just changed.
We all know we need to soak in the time we have with our kids before they grow up and leave us like we left our parents.
But what we should try to remember is that parenting is hard and it’s not realistic to believe that we should to bask in every moment like we’re sitting on a white sandy beach in the middle of the ocean. That’s not reality – at least not mine.
There are times I want to forget and other times that I want to cherish forever. Most of all, I want to remember those moments when I laughed so hard I figured I was on my way to gaining a six-pack or those times when my son sat in my arms and told me he loves me.
Those are the times we should savour. As for the other times – like when your kid decides to throw an epic tantrum in the middle of the mall because you won’t let him drive the car home, well, those time are the ones I think we can all forget.