Do you every wonder…”Why do my children hate me?”

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As a mother of three young children, this question pops into my mind on a daily basis. “Why do my children hate me?”  How can my sweet beautiful curly haired five year old turn into Dr. Jeckel in less than 30 seconds? Why does she think I am trying to kill her when I put her socks and shoes on in the morning before school? Why does she think the morning routine is a diabolical plan?

 

You wake up before dawn to wake them with a good morning song and it is almost a guarantee that one of the three will be in a bad mood. My favorite is when one wakes up with a contagious attitude. My daughter threw herself to the ground when I gave her socks and shoes; mind you the shoes were not filled with venomous jungle snakes, just regular pink sparkly sketchers.

 

Not five minutes later my youngest son is throwing muffins at my oldest telling him he is a smelly butthead.  I plead with them daily to at least take turns being assholes, but to no avail. We can’t go five minutes without a fight, a tantrum, or a physical altercation. I sometimes ponder selling tickets to the event; it’s like fight club for toddlers.

 

Why do they hate me? Is it because I cook, clean, wipes their asses? I beg of you to fill me in. Do I not give enough hugs? I am know to be a bit stingy in the hug department.  Is it the dripping sarcasm as I check homework? Please…fill me in. I won’t make it through their high school years if I have to be an on call referee between these three miniature angry trolls. Don’t get me wrong. I will always love them, but for the love of all things holy, tell me why you hate me! Explain why at four years old you refuse to learn to wipe your own ass? I don’t ask you to help me out when I’m done in the bathroom. “Mom, I’m done…..Come wipe my BUTT!”

 

Seriously, leave me the hell alone.  You would think that three small people with the same DNA would be able to find one common bond, but no. The only commonality is that they hate each other and conspire and plan their attacks on me.

I bet they fall asleep each night thinking about the ways they will torture me the next day. “Let’s pee all around the toilet and never make it in the bowl. No, I did that yesterday. I know… I’ll get up and yell and scream like I’m on fire because I don’t feel like getting dressed. No, wait I did that yesterday as well. Come on guys, I know we can find a new way piss her off until she sees red. Wait, I got it. We will all sit quietly until five minutes before dinner and then explode in a massive fight the second Dad walks in and start tearing up the house so he will ask Mom what she has been doing all day! Yes, that will do it.”

So until I figure out why my children want me to run away, I will find joy in hiding in my bathroom for 7 minute breaks pretending to poop so I can have a few seconds of peace.

12 COMMENTS

  1. As the mother of an only child, I miss out on the joys of multiple parenting. I do get to observe said behaviors periodically, but mostly, as the favorite auntie (Let me live in my fantasy), I get the sweet, angelic side of the children.

  2. I hate to say this, but my parenting was a bit unorthodox. I was a very stern, strict mother that was not going to negotiate with these little terrorists. I have 4 children 20, 17, 15 and 2. When the older three were younger we could have all the fun in the world, but I could take all that fun away in a split second if anyone of those children would scream, fight, or act out in any way shape or form. Violence was not allowed therefore you better find a way to work it out and get along. There was no need for me to use ‘time outs” or spankings. I just had to hold up my index finger and ask them if they wanted it and the look of fear on their faces was proof that I was doing something right. You see I never wanted to scold my children in public or have to deal with a tantrum in public. So at the first hint of inexcusable behavior I would take my finger and apply it to their pressure point behind their ear and whisper for them to stop. That was all it took. Now mind you I always reminded them of the rules before I did anything. If I was taking a trip to the store I let them know ahead of time not to ask for anything and they were not allowed to even touch anything. I got compliments everywhere I went. I had a system. I just touched a couple brief tools that I used. I spent hours interacting and reading with my children also. I was involved.
    Now this two year old of mine has my whole world upside down. She is hard headed as ever. All of my old tricks have failed me. She is running our household. She is a whole other breed of animal. I never understood why parents couldn’t control these love bugs until she came into my life. So now I treasure each and everyone of her sweet moments. I lost my whole focus thinking of her and my heart went to mush. Oh yeah. Why do our children hate us. Lol. I have no clue with this little one. She hates being in the car, she hates doing anything that isn’t destructive… Errmagosh!!! And, then all of the sudden out of nowhere she puts her little head on my chest and says “I love you Mommy”. I think that I have became a sucker for her attention. She does the same to her brother and sister. She’s my little sour patch kid. Thanks for reading my rant. I hope you enjoy.

  3. ok so I have a question, and I just want to know if there are any other moms that struggle with — i should do laundry, but I gotta finish this last chapter? I mean is it OK to have a lazy day even when there are a million things to do?

    • I think this is a rhetorical question! 🙂
      Of course it’s ok to have a “lazy” day even when there is work to be done. One thing to remember is that the laundry will be there tomorrow….enjoy the time that you have today! Even if the time that you have is only the quiet time when the kids are being good or sleeping and you actually have energy left to stay awake! Enjoy that 30 minutes to yourself….you deserve to relax as well! I know I end up feeling guilty afterwards, but it’s ok…chores will eventually get done!

    • Yes it is, and it is Okay if you allow or have your children help out with you it is okay for you as a parent to have a time out to

  4. Oddly enough, ask them and they will tell you if they in the middle of one of their I hate you moods.
    15 year old daughter- I always yell, take away her phone ( my motto take away what means most to each kid), make her go to church EVERY Sunday, I don’t give allowance (I only give money for extra chores If you don’t get it its not my fault) Her younger sister is allowed to do or get things she wasn’t allowed to so or get at her age. She is not allowed to do the things her friends do (Nope and she will thank me for it 20 years from now. Can hardly wait) I don’t listen to her blah blah blah the list went on and on.
    14 year old son- I want to be lazy and you make me do stuff.
    11 year old daughter- because you wont let me do what they get to do

  5. LOVE LOVE LOVE your videos!! They make my day!!! I am the mother of three boys and you are spot on!! My husband had the flu last month I must have showed him your man cold video 1000 times!! I laugh til I cry every time!! Please don’t stop!!

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